In my last post,  http://cafe.themarker.com/post/1772263,  I said I’d explain why I think Hebrew Speakers of English (HSE) may not want to use an expression like “It’s been a while” when greeting someone they don’t know very well who they haven’t  seen for some time.

Of course one of the reasons may be that they already have a different language block for this situation like: “Long time no see” or “It’s been ages”. All these are the sort of idiomatic expressions a native speaker of English might use.

But HSE may feel uncomfortable using this sort of idiomatic expression because characteristically in Hebrew there is a preference to be honest, to say what you mean in your own words, in a word, to be ‘דוגרי’.
(See Professor Tamar Katriel’s fascinating analysis of the topic ‘dugri’). There may be the feeling that using expressions of this sort will make a HSE sound פלצני or pretentious and unnatural. Quite the contrary!

Use of this sort of language block can make your English sound more natural. In fact, formulaic expressions like these are the framework on which we can build Small Talk. Now I am sure that everyone who does business outside Israel is aware of the need for making Small Talk. It’s used universally to build rapport and to establish a favourable environment when we first meet someone and before we ‘ get down to business ’. But although  there are  numerous reports on the internet of how important business deals have fallen through because something went wrong in the initial socialising stages of Small Talk, Hebrew speaking business people often tell me: “I can’t make Small Talk”. I don’t do it in Hebrew and I certainly can’t do it in English”.

The problem may be the underlying need to be ‘dugri’. Since Small Talk is largely built up from lots of formulaic expressions such as described above, HSE may avoid it.  And at the end of the day, that’s an individual choice everyone has to make.

But this doesn’t take care of the other side of Small Talk, the part we hear and interpret.  A short anecdote will illustrate one aspect of this problem. An Israeli businessperson met a Belgian colleague abroad and in the initial stages of their conversation asked: “Do you speak English?” The Belgian replied “A little”. On returning home, my Israeli client told me that he had been highly offended by this answer because it turned out that the Belgian spoke perfect English. On asking why he had been offended I was told:

הוא עשה ממני צחוק. האנגלית שלו הייתה הרבה יותר טובה מהאנגלית שלי. למה לא להגיד את האמת

 So my advice is: look out for idiomatic expressions and don’t be afraid to use them. And more importantly, don’t interpret what you hear literally. Remember that much of Small Talk is meaningless. More about this next time.
Lola