I suppose it's a mistake to assume that everyone would like to sound polite when they speak English.
I've been told more than once by Hebrew Speakers of English (HSE) that "I am what I am and if people don't like what I say and how I say it, that's too bad".

I've read blogs in which Native Speakers of English (NSE) in their 20s write that "Thank you" is a relic of an age past and it's unnecessary to use it in 2010.

I've heard that in some cultures it's considered unnecessary to say "Thank you", Especially if the interactants are family or close friends. To each his own

Before I continue with this post, it's important for me to say very clearly that my blog isn't intended to be moralistic. I hope it's clear that I'm trying to build an awareness of speaking norms in English and it's up to readers to take it or leave it.

Following on my last post: "Saying 'please ' in English doesn't necessarily mean you're being polite ", in this post I'm going to discuss the belief that if we say"Thank you"In English, we will definitely sound polite.

Unfortunately this is a misconception. Native English Speakers (NSE) often use "Thank you" as an automatic but meaningless language block.

Traditionally it's used as an acknowledgement of receipt of something and small children from English speaking homes are brought up to use it automatically whenever they receive something.
Parents will remind them to say "Thank you" by the prompt: "What do you say?" / "What's the magic word?"
(One HSE grandchild of a friend missed the cue and answered: "Abra Kadabra" )

The point to note here is that although it's meaningless, if we do not say "Thank you" in this context, we might be heard as sounding 'impolite'.

So even though we are living in an electronic age, when it may seem understandable that an email message has been received, it wouldn't harm to acknowledge receipt with a brief "Tnks".

Another 'meaningless' use of "Thank you" by NSE occurs in situations such as getting off a bus or collecting goods paid for in a store.
I say this is meaningless because rather than being an expression of thanks, it's more a way of saying "goodbye" to someone you don't know well. It is so meaningless that the expression doesn't even sound like they are saying "Thank you". It's more like they're saying the letter "Q".
 
So if we accept that the expression "Thank you" doesn't always indicate that thanks are being expressed, you may well be wondering what to say when you REALLY want to say "Thank you".

Anyone got any thoughts on this?

Watch this space for MY suggestions.

Lola