Missed the quiz in my last post? Here’s a chance to look at it again together with the answers and explanations of the best option for each situation. There are lots of tips to keep you safe when you are negotiating Small Talk minefields.

Just before you read on, let me tell you why I asked for the BEST option in each situation.
The thing is, when speaking English, hierarchy or the role relationship between speakers plays a much more important part than it does when we interact in Hebrew.
So in each situation, I refer to this aspect and if you base your choice of ‘best option’ with this in mind, you’ll probably choose the right answer.

ANSWERS & EXPLANATIONS

1. You meet a colleague for the first time and you say:
a. How do you do?
b. How’re you doing?
c. How are you?
d. How are you feeling?
1a is the best option in this situation.

If in Hebrew you would say: נאים מאוד when you are introduced to a business colleague, the only equivalent option offered here is “How do you do?”
(Other equivalents of נאים מאוד are: “Nice to meet you” / “Pleased to meet you”)

“How are you doing?” and “How are you?” are formulaic ways of saying ‘hello’ after you’ve already met someone, so they can’t be used in this situation.
Remember, these expressions are not equivalent to saying נאים מאוד.
Moreover let me remind you that “How do you do?” is NOT a translation for : ? מה נשמע .
I was at a conference when a Hebrew Speaker of English (HSE) said “How do you do?”  to a delegate she’d  met the day before and this delegate replied: “But we’ve already met”.
No one likes to feel they are quickly forgettable.    

“How are you feeling?” is an expression you can only use when you intend to ask about someone’s health or well-being.
It would be particularly appropriate to use when greeting a colleague who had complained on a previous occasion of not feeling well, maybe a bad headache or a touch of the ‘flu.
This sort of greeting says that you remember details and implies that you care. Good for a successful working relationship.
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2. You want to say ‘goodbye’ to a colleague you’ve met for the first time so you say:
a. Nice to meet you.
b. Nice meeting you.
c. Nice to see you.
d. It was an honor to meet you.
2b is the best option in this situation.

As mentioned above, the Hebrew equivalent of “Nice to meet you” is נאים מאוד so it would be inappropriate to use this language block when saying goodbye to a colleague you’d met for the first time.

“Nice to see” you is a formulaic expression used to say ‘hello’ to someone you’ve already met.

“It was an honor to meet you” sounds very exaggerated in the given situation.
It would only be appropriate to use if you’d been introduced to a VIP like the queen!
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3. You are saying ‘goodbye’ to a senior colleague who has accepted your invitation for dinner later that same day and say:
a. I expect to see you this evening.
b. I hope to see you this evening
c. I look forward to seeing you this evening
d. See you later.
3c is the best option in this situation.

You may be wondering why 3a isn’t equally as good as 3c, since it’s a direct translation of:
מצפים לראות אותך הערב
Even my electronic dictionary translates this Hebrew expression as: “I expect to see you this evening”
Of course the translation is literally accurate, but it doesn’t account for the relationship between speakers.
And I hope that readers of my blog by now realize how ‘dangerous’ it can be to translate directly from Hebrew into English
So it would only be appropriate for a boss or מפקד to say to subordinates:
“I expect to see you this evening”,  since the real message is “Be there or else”.
Imagine the surprise of your senior colleague if you were to use this expression in this situation!

Saying “I hope to see you this evening” suggests that the arrangements haven’t yet been confirmed and might cause some confusion if used in the given situation.

“See you later” is for me, an informal way of saying : מצפים לראות אותך הערב
It is something I’d say to a friend with whom I had made arrangements to meet but wouldn’t say it to a senior colleague.
 (Youngsters who are Native Speakers of English (NSE) sometimes say:
” See you later alligator” to which the response is “In a while, crocodile”.)

Let me add one last point here. Australians say “See you later” simply as another way of saying ‘goodbye’. There is no implication that you have an arrangement to meet later.
So if you are interacting with an Australian, don’t misinterpret their message.
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4. You have some guests from abroad who are visiting your office for the first time one morning.
You want to offer them something to drink so you say:
a. Do you want to drink anything?
b. Can I suggest you something to drink?
c. Want a drink?
d. Won’t you have something to drink?
4d is the best option in this situation.

Basing myself on the responses of participants in my workshops, I’m guessing that few people chose this as the best option for this situation.
I know that the negative form of the question in English sounds very uninviting to the ears of a HSE.
But there is a grammatical rule that says: ‘A negative questions anticipates a positive response’.
So in fact, by expressing the offer in the negative form, NSE are implying that they hope you’ll say ‘Yes please’ to their offer.

“Do you want to drink anything?” translated into Hebrew is a very acceptable way of offering guests something to drink.
However the offer expressed in this way in English sounds very direct and uninviting.

It may even sound to NSE visitors that the offer is only being made לצאת לידי חובה.
As a result they may refuse your offer. Not a good environment for conducting business.

“Can I suggest you something to drink?” is an ungrammatical translation of:
.אפשר להציע לך משהו לשתות
Many of the clients I coach don’t realize that  להציע    can be translated  into English by two words:
suggest and offer. It seems they invariably choose the wrong option.

“Want a drink” implies that you are offering something alcoholic. Apart from being informal in tone, it’s unlikely that an Israeli business person would offer alcohol to guests during the morning.
But if you’re travelling to some parts of Europe, don’t be surprised if this happens.
Just make sure you have an appropriate response ready.
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5. You are visiting a colleague’s office aboard and you are asked whether you’d prefer to have tea or coffee. Both are OK so you say:
a. Never mind.
b. I don’t mind.
c. I don’t care.
d. Don’t mind me.
5b is the best option in this situation.

“Never mind” is a formulaic expression, which has the same meaning as “No big deal”.
The Hebrew equivalent would be something like: תשכח מזה. 
So if you used this expression in this situation, it would mean you’d end up getting nothing at all to drink.

“I don’t care” translates into  לא איכפת לי    which I'm told, wouldn’t sound at all negative as a Hebrew response in the given situation.
However in English, this formulaic expression sounds very negative and could even cause offence.
So don’t use it anytime you mean to say לא איכפת לי in a positive way.

“Don’t mind me” is clearly a distracter item here and therefore not a possible response in the given situation.
But it is a formulaic expression which translates to mean something like: את/ה מפריע לי  or את/ה לא בסדר
A NSE might say this to express strong criticism of someone who had behaved in an ‘unacceptable’ way like pushing into a line or obscuring someone's view by standing up in a cinema.
It’s not something to say if you’re trying to win friends and influence people.  

That’s it for now.

Keep reading my blog for more tips which will help you say what you really mean to say when you speak English.
And don’t forget, I’d really welcome feedback and questions whether in Hebrew or in English.

Lola