There is a lot of talk going around, about how what we say about ourselves today inevitably decides our future. You know all the blip blah blah blah. So I for one have devised my own new language which both makes you sound better and I guess on a subconscious level feel better. (By the way the below is a joke, I have been told some people took it seriously, I am too dark to be an optimist come on)

Here are just a few examples:

I am not single – I am between boyfriends (so true)

I am not paying too much rent – I have a fabulous apartment in Tel Aviv (not worth what I pay)

I am not unhappy about my role at work – I am paving my way to a brilliant career (which involves doing a lot of shit)

I don’t wish I had bigger breasts – I am an intellectual, with no interest in physical beauty (yours yes, mine no)

I am not jealous off…. – I am so happy I don’t have to deal with that stuff anymore (going abroad and being in love)

I am not bored – I like interesting people (no, you’re just boring)

I am not heavy – I go with the flow (of my own heaviness)

I am not a geek – I have various interests (all of which include dressing up as a super hero)

I am not too poor to buy my own place – I am free from life’s burdens.

And for those of you who are unemployed my favorite: I am currently between projects

So you get the idea…..anything to add?